If there is one thing that I really can't stand it's being lied to. I'm pretty sure that you feel the same way. When I find out that someone has lied to me I get more angry at the fact that the person was dishonest with me more than whatever it is that they felt they had to lie to me about. I think that is because telling me that lie is like planting a seed of mistrust in my heart. If you have lied to me about this then what else have you lied to me about? What will you lie to me about in the future? There will always be this doubt and even if that person never ever lies to me again, I will always have that question at the back of my mind......"Is it true? Is it a lie?". You feel the same way, don't you?
So why do you and I constantly tell lies?
"What???" "How dare you?" "I don't tell lies!"
Ah, if only that were true!
You see, you and I are constantly telling lies.....to ourselves! The greatest lie that you ever tell yourself is "I CAN'T". Think about it. I'm right, aren't I? How many times have you talked yourself out of doing something because you told yourself that you couldn't possibly do it and so why even try? We are always doing it! And what's worse is that we always believe it!
Now, when I tell my one year old daughter that she can't do something, guess what? She goes right ahead and does it anyway! She's almost doing it just to prove to me that even though I might say that she can't, she believes that she can! My 3 year old, however, has learned that if mummy says you can't, but you do it regardless, then there will probably be a consequence to face and so when he is told that he can't, he will fight that urge to prove that he actually can! We learn as we grow older that if someone says we can't then we had better suppress that desire to attempt it so that we don't have to face the consequences. We have trained ourselves to believe it when we are told that we can't do something.
It is also worth noting that if someone else tells us that we can't do something, we will usually question why, but when we tell ourselves that we can't do something then we just accept it without question. We believe ourselves especially when we don't believe IN ourselves. We don't consider that we are lying to ourselves.
How many times have you thought of an idea, or wanted to try something new, or had an amazing dream or plan but before you could take a step of action you talked yourself out of it? I bet you've done it more than once. I have too.
"I'm not good enough"
"Nothing will come of it"
"I don't have time"
"I don't have the finances"
"I don't have the experience"
"I don't want to fail"
Sounds familiar, right?
So what if, just once, you didn't listen to your own lie? Because that's what it is! If you have a desire to do something, or a dream to follow, or an idea for something new then I believe you most certainly can do it! Think of all of the people who have done amazing things in this world, the inventors and discoverers. I'm sure that when they first thought up an idea or a plan or first had that dream that they lied to themselves and said, "I can't". But then, somehow, they stopped listening to that lie and they started taking action. And when others came along and told them "you can't" I bet they questioned them and asked "why not?". And I'm almost sure something else inside of them thought "I'll prove you wrong". And they did!
And YOU can!
It's about time we got angry at the fact that we are being dishonest with ourselves just as much as we would get angry with someone else! It's time we worked on rebuilding trust in who we are. I want you to think of just one thing that you've told yourself you can't do. Maybe you told yourself you couldn't lose weight, you couldn't learn that new skill, you couldn't apply for that job, you couldn't give up cigarettes, you couldn't go on that date, you couldn't make that apology. You've told yourself you can't do it because it's too difficult and you don't have what it takes, BUT YOU DO! Recognise the lie for what it is! What if you just took that chance and it paid off? Isn't it worth the risk?
Write down that one thing you thought of. Tell yourself that YOU CAN! Give it a go and watch what happens! Even if it doesn't happen the FIRST time - don't give up. Thomas Edison had to endure 1000 fails before he had a successful light bulb - but he didn't give up and where would we be without the light bulb today?
Let's stop lying to ourselves and let's start believing we can! Go on, take that action step today.